Anxiety and excitement
It’s been almost a month since my last post. Not exactly living up to the name of the newsletter. It’s been a hectic month personally—Shivantika and I just made the move to NYC. Looking forward to getting back on track now.
These last few weeks have been an emotional whirlwind. Before leaving, I was anxious. We didn’t know if we could immigrate. We were in the process of finalizing a lease. And I didn’t know how we would emotionally process leaving home.
Once we landed in NYC, that anxiety turned to excitement. Pizza, friends, and a new apartment were waiting for us.
But, as I’ve been sitting with these emotions during my meditations over the last few weeks, I have noticed that anxiety and excitement come from the same place. They are the same sensation in the body—a sensation of some disturbance from our normal equanimity and state of calm.
It’s just the narrative that’s different. Anxiety manifests that same feeling as negative fear, while excitement manifests it as positive purpose. It’s a fitting reminder that the narrative we tell ourselves is what really determines our reality.